My boyfriend lives in New Jersey and I live in Texas. We visit a lot, and I can see him pulling away, but he won't come out and say it directly. How can I get the answers I am seeking from him? I love him and I want to be with him, but I am not so sure he wants the same anymore. -Too Distant And Confused
Dear Too Distant And Confused,
Extended separation can take its toll on anyone. The way to maintain a long distance relationship is through communication. You need to be the equivalent of each other's best friends. Share your problems, your daily successes, etc. You both need to feel like you're talking to your friend who lives just down the street, instead of miles away. When a break in the communication occurs you need to find out where it is coming from, and why, fairly quickly. In your situation could there be other factors that may be making him feel distant or distracted? Could he be having an exceptionally hard time at school, work or even with his family? Get him to talk about it with you. Tell him how you are feeling, and that you feel like he may not be into this relationship anymore. Remember, every relationship has its ups and downs. The key is just getting through them.