My heart has never healed from a relationship that I had almost 10 years ago. We didn't break up on bad terms. It was mutual. We both really loved each other, and in a way, I think we both remain in each other's hearts. I just don't know how to let go of this romance. I don't know how to heal and move on and not expect my future relationships to be like the one I had. I miss my best friend (that is what he was to me). And, I fear that I let go of the best thing that can ever happen to me. My fear is that I will never love that fiercely and intensely again. What should I do? -Will I Ever Move On?
Dear Will I Ever Move On?,
The first thing I think you need to realize is that there are many different types of love. Each relationship and feelings experienced during the relationship will vary vastly. To expect to feel the same is to deny yourself the possibility of something greater. Let's imagine you only had one type of fruit your entire life. For the sake of this example, the fruit was cantaloupe. To you it was the best tasting piece of food you've ever had. It was so good you were unwilling to try any other types of fruit. While cantaloupe may be an excellent fruit, there is a wide variety of fruit out there. Limiting your entire taste buds to one fruit has robbed you of experiencing the strawberry, the watermelon, the grape or the orange. All these fruits are equally as great, if not better. You can't live your life in the past, waiting for a second chance to do things differently. Doing so is only taking you away from experiencing things that could be better. Don't be scared to give love another try. You never know, your first love may be like the cantaloupe. There could quite possibly be a better fruit out there for you. All you need to do is try them out. For more on eradicating the ghosts of your past, read and follow the advice in this article.